A Small Part of a Big Picture

Why me?

Why is this happening to me?

Have you ever asked yourself this before? Maybe you had car troubles on the way to an important appointment. Or perhaps the WIFI went down before you could send out your resume for that perfect job.

Perhaps the better question should be why not me?

In the shamanic view of creation, everything is connected. Eastern yogic practices acknowledge a universal field. And those who study particle physics, going farther and farther down into the atom, atomic particles, and then subatomic particles, will say that the space between these particles is immense. Eventually, it all filters down to what appears to be nothing. A universal field, the void, all that is, the Akashic Records; there are many names for this space.

So what does this vast emptiness have to do with personal disasters? Quite a lot, as it turns out.

I recently had to let go of an old and comfortable relationship with someone I trusted because I started seeing a hidden side of him. On the surface he presented one thing, but deep down his actions seemed to speak the opposite. I admit that I felt like I’d been hit by a train at full speed. The anger eventually gave way to depression. Here was my occasional business partner, someone with whom who I’d shared a lot of interesting work and social engagements, and now I was on my own. Why me?

I’d been here before. Job losses, relationship break ups, things going horribly wrong. Yes, I’d been here before, but this time, I knew what to do. I allowed myself time to grieve because this process is important. Then I let it all go and took a deep breath and waited.

Something else was coming. The universe had other plans for me, and those plans did not include my ex-partner. I couldn’t go where I wanted to go with someone who didn’t walk with integrity, so I took the risk of flying solo.

And suddenly, amazing things started happening.  Work offers I could not have seen coming and new business partnerships suddenly appeared. Why was this happening to me? Because I was able to see the bigger picture.

Most of us have been through various traumas and dramas in our lives. While they are happening, we feel like grains of sand being rolled in shore waves, tossed around and slammed down with a force. We protest, we ask God to help us, we complain, we do what we can to make the issue just stop. But then time passes. Months, maybe years, then we are able to look back and see the entire chain of dominoes. That one event or series of events happened for a reason. Perhaps that relationship was toxic. Perhaps we were meant to be doing something else with our lives. It’s not until we are able to let go of what was holding us down that we can fly.

So the next time you get a flat tire or your new date ghosts you, take a deep breath.  That flat tire may have delayed your arrival at a disaster scene. That absent date could have been a homicidal, ax-wielding maniac. At this point, you don’t really need explanations. Just relax, breathe, and know it is all a small part of a bigger picture, a picture you will be able to see in time.

Have patience, dear one. In that seeming emptiness of the universal field lies your destiny. When you release attachment to the smaller events, you will enter the flow of your big picture. And when you do, you will be able to finally say, “Ohhhhhh, now I understand!”